Articles on Vocation and the Priesthood
2009: The first in a NEW series of articles written by priests about their calling to the priesthood
Growing up, whenever I thought about priesthood I was able to dismiss it. My earliest thoughts on priesthood were in primary school. These thoughts or ‘niggles’ continued, at times more persistent than others. However, after leaving school they disappeared. When ideas or the thought of priesthood would return would be when I was unhappy or frustrated with work. Things would not be going the way I thought that they should.
I was lucky and had managed to secure employment with a bank upon leaving school at 16. I remained with the bank for 11 years, eventually deciding to leave in 1999. This was after I had secured a fairly good position with HSBC International. Everything I had thought I wanted and had worked hard for I now had. Then ‘the niggle’ returned.
I was on pilgrimage in Lourdes in 1998 and that ‘the niggle’ came back. I could not say that I had enjoyed my pilgrimage to Lourdes. It was my first time there as a helper. I do not know what assumptions I had created about the place of Lourdes or that of my fellow pilgrims but whatever my assumptions were they were soon challenged on many levels.
I remember toward the end of the pilgrimage, I managed to find some space for myself. I went to the grotto early in the morning/late at night. This is one of those rare moments in my life when I really felt that prayer was working. Not that I wanted to hear the answer. Me a priest - I had too much to lose.
After talking with various people, priests and my family, a formal application was made and accepted. I started seminary at Ushaw in 1999. After four years I decided that I had too many questions which remained unanswered and with the support of the college my family and Bishop Ambrose I decided to leave. The diocese gave me the space I needed to think and pray while maintaining a level of contact that I was comfortable with.
After three years ‘the niggle’ had returned and was as strong as ever. I re-entered seminary formation in 2006. After two further years of training I was ordained as a priest for the diocese of Hexham and Newcastle in St Cuthbert’s Chapel Ushaw College. This was the bi-centennial year of celebrations. It was the late Bishop Kevin who suggested St Cuthbert’s Chapel as a venue. I was delighted to accept the invitation and the generosity and hospitality that the College could provide.
I am approaching my first anniversary on 6th June. People ask me how have I found priesthood. All I can say is that I am really enjoying my time as a priest. I don’t know whether I should, but I am. With the Lord’s help I hope I may continue to enjoy this ministry which he has invited me to share in. Don’t be shy - give it a chance explore the possibilities. Believe me it has been worth it.
See also other articles written by priests
If you are thinking about the priesthood as a vocation and would like to find out more monthly Enquirers' Nights are held in the Diocese at Our Lady Queen of Peace, Penshaw. Each evening begins at 7pm with prayer. This is followed by a period of reflection and a meal together. Meetings end at 9pm.
If you would like to attend please contact Fr Michael McCoy, Diocesan Vocations Promoter